Daniel Ingram - Mastering the Core Teachings of Buddha - An Unusually Hardcore Dharma Book
I include all of this in the section called “A Clear Goal” because the very sense of a drive to find something is actually the thing it is seeking.
The motivation is looking for itself. In those sensations themselves is something very powerful and amazing. However, in order to see this, a shift has to happen in which the drive becomes driven to understand the sensations of that drive itself rather than looking to future sensations for satisfaction. This is a completely unintuitive thing to do, and this is one reason why meditation practices can seem so awkward sometimes.
However, the fact that the drive or the goal contains its own solution is the reason why there is such relentless emphasis on being present to what is happening now. If we can get this drive to just chill on its future fixation and simply understand itself, insight is close at hand.
If you feel frustrated that your practice has not been as energized or as clear as you wish it to be, first sit with the fullness of that wish, with the fullness of that frustration, with the fullness of your fears, with the fullness of your hopes, with the fullness of that suffering and compassion, as clearly and bravely as you possibly can until you understand them to their very depths as they actually are. Channel all of this energy into clear, precise, kind and focused living and practice.
Since this whole book is clearly goal-oriented, I thought that it would be appropriate to add a few guidelines about formulating specific goals and working towards mastery that can help reduce the problems that 113
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poorly conceived goals can cause. Goals tend to involve a heavy future component. The trick is to add a component that relates to the Here and Now as well.
For instance, one could wish to become enlightened. This is a purely future-oriented goal. One could also wish to understand the true nature of the sensations that make up one’s world so clearly that one becomes enlightened. This adds a present component and thus makes the whole thing much more reasonable and workable. One could simply wish to deeply understand the true nature of the sensations that make up one’s world as they arise in that practice session or during that day. This is a very immediate and present-oriented goal, and a very fine one indeed. It is also method-oriented rather than result-oriented. This is the mark of a good goal.
Similarly, one could try to be kind, honest or generous that day, try to appreciate interdependence that day, or try to stay really concentrated on some object for that practice session. These present and method-oriented goals are the foundation upon which great practice is based.
Purely future-oriented goals are at best mostly worthless and at worst very dangerous.
Wishing to become enlightened or more enlightened is only helpful if it helps one live in the present as it is. The same goes for training in morality and concentration, as articulated in Part I. A good friend of mine once forgot these basic rules of goal-oriented practice and strived with great energy for months to attain a goal that had nothing to do with the reality that he was experiencing at that time. The results were disastrous and the dark consequences of his error ring on to this day.
Don’t get burned by the shadow side of goal-oriented practice. Avoid competition and comparing your practice to others. Stay present-oriented whenever possible, and always avoid purely future-oriented or results-oriented goals! Also, be careful what you ask for. You just might get it but with a price you could never have imagined.
It should be noted that thoughts of the past and future occur now.
These sensations are worthy of investigation. “Future mind” is only a problem if the sensations that make it up are not understood as they are. A fun practice to try is consciously thinking thoughts whose content is past- or future-oriented and noticing that they occur now. There is 114
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something particularly profound about this that might be missed on first inspection.
While I am on the subject of goal-oriented practice, I should say a few words about how to avoid overdoing it. First, if those around you, particularly those with a lot of experience in meditation and the spiritual life, are telling you that you should chill out a bit, they are probably saying it for good reason. Ask them why they think that and take their opinions into consideration. Now, it is true that sometimes people will tell you to chill out on your practice a bit just because of their own envy of your determination and diligence, but I haven’t found this to be a common occurrence.
When on intensive retreats, there are a few basic ways to sail a bit too far out there too fast. The first is to stop eating. It is true that there is a long and glorious tradition of people fasting when doing spiritual practice, but generally they do so because they want to bring on severely altered states of consciousness. Fasting when meditating is an effective technique for doing this. Should you be doing insight practices, altered states are not your intended focus, and so these are more likely to be distracting than helpful. Further, severely altered states of consciousness can sometimes be very disruptive and hard to process, leading to what might be considered by some to be temporary insanity. If you are the sort of person who would drop LSD when out in public, then the altered states that fasting might bring on would probably not be a problem for you. On the other hand, if you are on retreat with other people, consideration for the fact that they may not want to deal with the potential side effects of your vision-quest is warranted.
Another way to go way out on the edge is to stop sleeping. Sleep deprivation can eventually lead to very altered states of consciousness and visionary experiences. The exact same considerations that come into play with not eating apply. While it may be true that when doing intensive practice the need for sleep may go down to perhaps 4-6 hours or sometimes less, try to get at least some sleep every night.
There are those that are such macho meditators that they will try to sit for very long periods of time, say 10 to 24 hours. While this might seem like a really brave thing to do, a real tribute to one’s determination, I don’t see the point. I have managed to make very rapid 115
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progress when on intensive retreats where the longest sit I did was 4
hours and most were less than 1.5 hours. However, if one sits long enough and really pushes the investigation with heroic effort, one can get into states of consciousness that are quite volatile. It can be very difficult to ground back down and integrate what comes out of that sort of extreme practice. Again, out of consideration for your mind and body, as well as for those around you on retreat who may not want to deal with your potential inability to integrate and control the energy that can be generated from that sort of practice, consider moderation in sitting.
Lastly, there are some who will try to mix mind-altering substances and meditation. This can seem like an easy and fast path. In fact, there are countless traditions that use these as an integral part of their path.
However, there are numerous strong warnings against doing this at all or against doing this without the guidance of those that really know what they are doing and when not in the proper setting (e.g. far out in the desert with no one around except a friend to keep you safe and no big cliffs or weapons nearby). I have found that simply doing really consistent insight or concentration practices well can quickly produce altered states and strange experiences that have taken me to the very brink of what I could handle skillfully and sometimes beyond, many of which I will discuss in Part III, so I don’t see the need for using mind altering substances. Further, there are reasons to learn to see things from different points of view on our own power so that these things may become a part of who and what we are rather than some transient side effect brought on by tinkering with our neurochemistry.
In short, those on the path of heroic effort can easily get side tracked into ritualistic displays that seem like heroic effort, but they are not. Heroic effort on the insight path means heroic investigation of the Three Characteristics of the sensations that make up our experience, whatever they may be. Thus, my advice when on an insight meditation retreat is to really power the investigation all day long, whether you are sitting, walking, reclining, standing, eating, washing, etc. Get enough sleep. Eat well to keep up your health. Take care of your body, particularly your knees and back.
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Should those with more experience than you in these matters
consistently tell you to back off on the effort just a bit, give it a try. I have occasionally done otherwise and regretted it. William Blake wrote that we do not know what is enough unless we know what is more than enough. Unfortunately, most insight meditators will not put forth enough effort to know either. However, should you find that you are simply cooking yourself through too much effort, learn from your mistakes and follow the middle path.
The last point about having a clear goal I make reluctantly, as I am afraid that I will justify the very thing I wish to speak out against. Here goes…
I heard someone speculating that Zen might have developed as being very austere and drab because of how colorful and unstable Japan was during its development, and likewise the Tibetan tradition was very colorful and complex because Tibet was so bleak. Burmese Buddhism might be so extremely technical, goal-oriented, efficient and effective because their country is such a chaotic mess. Perhaps in just this way, we have the most goal-oriented culture in the world and yet tend towards the least goal-oriented, least practical and least effective take on Buddhism I have found anywhere.
It is an unfortunate shadow side of our culture that many of us can barely tolerate one more goal to attain, one more hoop to jump through, one more exam to pass, one more certification or degree to obtain, one more SUV to buy. Perhaps we are crafting a Buddhism in which you don’t have to really ever accomplish anything so as to find a refuge from our extremely neurotic fixation on achievement. This might explain why we often fixate on teachings such as “Effortless effort”,
“There is nothing to attain,” and postponing enlightenment through the Bodhisattva Vow. Believe me, as someone who has two graduate degrees and actively involved in a field that requires constant reading, recertification, and training, I am often sick of the whole achievement trip as well.
On the other hand, I have found that goal-oriented practice
combined with good instruction and a few good conceptual frameworks is largely unstoppable barring extreme circumstances. Thus, if you are sick of goals to the point that you can’t make any room for those that 117
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will soon follow, strip down your daily life down so as to make room for the drive to master the states and stages of the path. Take more vacations, back off on the career-ladder climbing a little, and make time to really bust out some serious meditative accomplishments. The Buddha was known for saying that there was nothing so valuable in this world as mastering the dharma. I couldn’t agree more.
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17.HARNESSING THE ENERGY OF THE “DEFILEMENTS”
I am astounded at how many people are completely paralyzed in their practice because they feel bad about so many of the types of emotional sensations that arise. Unrealistic ideals of the emotional perfection that meditation might bring often create an inability to face one’s actual humanity or to continue practicing. The energy in
“undesirable” emotions can actually be used to fuel one’s practice, which is good, as this is much of what we have to work with.
This paralysis happens because people tend to feel that “bad”
emotions should not arise and are worthless and embarrassing. While there is a lot to be said for repressing the “defilements,” there is also a lot to be said for using their tremendous energy in ways that are skillful.
Basically, until we are very enlightened, some odd mixture of compassion and confusion motivates everything we do, as mentioned elsewhere, and so we have to learn to work with this. Further, these potentially useful emotional energies will continue to arise like the weather, even in very enlightened beings (contrary to popular belief), so we must learn how to deal with them and use them well.
Remember that these practices and teachings are not about
becoming some kind of emotionally devoid, non-existent entity, but about clearly understanding the truth of our humanity and life.
Becoming fluent in the true nature of all categories of sensations, including the sensations that make up all categories of emotions, is a particularly good idea and highly recommended. This might even be undertaken as a systematic practice by those who are dedicated to thorough understanding. Thus, those doing noting practice, which I highly recommend, can note which emotions they are feeling, such as fear, boredom, anger, confidence, restlessness, joy, jealousy, etc.
Further, if the powerful energy of the emotional life can be harnessed to energize our practice, this can be extremely helpful. Some level of skill and moderation is required here, a middle way between defilement restraint and energy transmutation. Either extreme can be harmful or helpful depending on how much wisdom the student has, how good their teachers are, and how well the student listens to their teachers.
Harnessing the Energy of the “Defilements”
It should be noted that those who are passionate about practice and learning to actually practice correctly are much more likely to make progress than those who are not. Those who are able to channel all their rage, frustration, lust, greed, despair, confusion and anguish into trying to find a better way are the only ones who are likely to have what it takes to finally attain freedom. Those who are actually able to sit with the specific sensations that make up rage, lust, anger, confusion and all the rest with clarity, precision, acceptance of their humanity, and equanimity are even more likely to get enlightened. This paragraph deserves to be read more than once.
It is common for be people to feel bad about their lack of progress.
This can cause them to feel extremely frustrated, and produce all sorts of self-judgment, jealousy, extremes of blind faith, and rigid adherence to dogma. It can paralyze a student’s practice if they get caught in these or in thinking that desire for enlightenment is a problem when in fact it is the most compassionate wish that someone could have for themselves or others. The whole trick is to channel this energy into actual practice using good technique rather than comparison or thoughts about progress. Simply examine the sensations that make up all of this frustration and comparison, i.e. don’t stop investigating when certain categories of sensations arise.
Try this little exercise the next time some kind of strong and seemingly useless or unskillful emotion arises. First, stabilize precisely on the sensations that make it up and perhaps even allow these to become stronger if this helps you to examine them more clearly. Find where these are in the body, and see as clearly as possible what sorts of images and story lines are associated with these physical sensations. Be absolutely clear about the full magnitude of the suffering in these, how long each lasts, that these sensations are observed and not particularly in one’s control.
